Between Parent and Child: The Bestselling Classic That Revolutionized Parent-Child Communication

Let's start with a story. When 5-year-old Nancy first went to kindergarten with her mother, she spotted a painting on the wall and asked aloud, "Who made these ugly pictures?" Embarrassed, Nancy's mother looked at her daughter disapprovingly and told her, "It's not nice to call the pictures ugly when they are so pretty." In reality, Nancy didn’t mean to shame the creator of the painting. She just wanted to know if her own less than perfect paintings could also be displayed on the wall.

A teacher standing next to them understood what Nancy was trying to say, so she smiled and said, "In here you don't have to paint pretty pictures. You can paint mean pictures if you feel like it." With this satisfying answer, Nancy smiled because her real question had been noticed and answered. She now understood that even when someone can’t paint that well, their paintings can still be put on the wall. Through this exchange, Nancy understood that the teacher was very kind and wouldn't get mad even if her drawings weren't pretty. Nancy felt safe with this teacher, so she waved goodbye to her mother and confidently began her day at kindergarten.